Friday, June 08, 2012

I'm trying to move forward

Right now I have about 5 half written blog posts that I cannot seem to finish. Something about they way they are written doesn't sound right. I can't seem to find the words I need to articulate what I really want to say. I have felt like this for a while~ stale might be a good way to describe it. Anyway I have pinpointed that the move has seriously thrown me off course. It may sound strange to some but this move was a big deal and something just isn't working at the new place. It doesn't feel like home and I have finally realised why.

I am angry and I am resisting with every fibre of my being this becoming my new home. Because of the move my baby girl Spaz has run away and it's broken my heart. The last time I saw her was on the 6th May. At first I thought she might have been sulking somewhere; a bit pissed off for being kept inside for a week. But after a couple of days I realised that she wasn't going to come home. Something told me that she was gone. (Please don't mistake this for being pessimistic or loosing hope. I will always hope that she comes home to me). I miss her so much that it hurts to think about it. I actually begin to cry~ she was my first cat and I love her. I keep expecting her to be there when I get home from work and she isn't.

This, amongst other things, has made me resist turning this house into a home. I have noticed a change in myself too, not necessarily for the better. But I will not bore you with more details- let me get to the point. 

Whilst pondering upon all of this last night I got an email. I saw who it was from and decided to have a read through. I love getting updates from the amazing Leonie and thought it might give me the 'cheer-up' kick I needed. In a round-about kind of a way it did. You see Leonie is going to be making some changes to the pricing of her Goddess Circle. I have always wanted to join but kept putting it off because (amongst many other excuses) I had other things I should to pay off first.

The change in the pricing for this incredibly delicious collection of resources made me realise that Leonie was offering quite a remarkable deal at just $99 for e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g- for an entire year!! I didn't need to think about it for a whole lot longer before I decided I wanted needed to do this. There are still things I should pay off first but you know what? Screw it! It's only money- and this could be the start of something incredible. I have nothing to loose and a whole load to gain.

And guess what the first thing I will be doing is? Reading through the Sacred Space Crearing Kit. From there I have no idea where I will begin because there is just so much to read but I am excited. Very excited to see where this takes me.

Rhiannon xxoxx

P.S. I am convinced that Spaz is still alive, but has chosen to do her own thing. I will continue to hope and pray that she comes home; nothing is impossible.


  1. Great post! So proud of you :> When you think about Spaz maybe try to think of how lucky you were to have each other for as long as you did... remember the good without getting bogged down in the loss and the 'stories' that we all tend to build around that. We can only work with the present, and be grateful for what we have right now... this minute. xx

    1. Thanks Aunty Sheen <3 You are absolutely right. Focus on the good times =) xox